Sweepstake time! Did we watch this dated monstrosity for real, or did we do it with the virtual company of others who gently riffed it for us as we watched, thus saving us from about 50% of the usual mockery requirements?
It was indeed, a RiffTrax.
And now on to the brutal, violent world in which a young girl finds herself, having to struggle to survive every day… no, wait, wrong movie. My bad.
And now on to the genteel, monied world in which a young girl finds herself after her parents are killed in a complicated mob hit that I didn’t pay half enough attention to. Laurel is adopted by the mob boss himself, grows up to be a barrister, marries the son of the mob boss, is widowed, carves out her own place in the brutal world of the mafia mostly by doing business and wearing nice clothes.
Some cut-throat business deals happen in what feels like real-time, except the throat cutting isn’t literal.
It’s like a cheap version of Business Simulator 1988. The movie poster is 98% lies and tries to give it a cheap sex thrill that the movie totally doesn’t have. She is an actual barrister. It’s a shame that she seems to also achieves her status on the back of several love stories. But you know, if you have some time to kill while you’re staying alert and staying home, there are much, much worse things to think about.