Nobody Sleeps in the Woods Tonight. Slasher horror gore fest, set in the Polish woods. Lots of components to the story that I’ve seen before: it sticks to an established drumbeat with the occasional flourish.
So. Assemble a cast made mostly of teenagers. Remove their technology (including their phones), equip them with one capable guide and an easy -to-spot Last Girl, and launch them into the woods.
What could go wrong?
Well. A lot, actually. But mostly what goes wrong is the escape of some alien-mutated twins from the basement where their crazy mother has kept them for some considerable time.
Did I like this movie? It wasn’t unlikeable, even though I can’t say this is my favourite genre of movies. I think my enjoyment of watching vaguely unpleasant teenagers get picked off one by one peaked and died somewhere in the middle of the iconic Final Destination era (from the Time Before Review Notes existed).
Compared against similar genre movies of more recent years, it was much better than Zombeavers (although that was intended to be a comedy horror) and of course much, much worse than The Cabin in the Woods (which I have seen, but in the Time Before Review Notes existed). It was better overall than Terrifier, but the monsters in this were nowhere near as memorable as Art the Clown who stole the show in that one.
I’m going to rate this one ‘enjoyable’ and leave it there. By the way? ‘Nobody Sleeps in the Woods Tonight’? Some of them totally did.